Sunday, April 22

Too much doubts

Took a 2 hours and 30 minutes flight to Sandakan this morning. Been flying so much lately it is starting to make me feel extra lazy to even fly for holidays. All these travels I've been doing are just for work and not holidays as some may perceive. 

Image result for gif flying

Anyway, that aside, recently I've started to notice something about myself. I think I'm slowly revealing another side of me. What do I mean by it? Well I notice I have a big issue of trusting people these days. I'm not sure why but I just seem to doubt everything. I think I was not so doubtful of so many things before like how I am now.

I know it is a bad thing but, I don't know. It just seem to happen automatically in me. Like a switch was flipped and here I am having this sort of personality.

So like I mentioned in my previous post that I'm seeing someone right? I'm having a huge issue with trust not including honesty here. I just can't seem to trust what ever is said or shared to me. I just doubt every single thing till at times I just have to swallow my doubts and just make do with what ever is said as it is. The more I question or try to proof to myself that my doubts are wrong, it just makes me feel even worse. 

Is this normal? Or is it due to my past? I'm wondering. 

Things like this always does bother me day and night. People always say things like "Don't worry it will be okay" or "Don't think so much" but how do you actually do that? I'm good at telling people to do that too but when it comes to myself doing it becomes extremely tough.

Sometimes I do wonder as well why do we or maybe myself put ourselves or myself in such situation? It is like when there's no problem, we go finding one. Hahahaha. 


2 comments:

  1. I think it's a good attitude to have when meeting someone new. Always doubt whatever you have been told till it's proven right. Just don't show it on your expression hahaha it will save a lot of heartbreak in the future

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  2. last line is so true. it's a human condition, i've come to note. when things are too smooth-sailing, you suddenly feel weirded out because it's not "normal." definitely sounds like you have trust issues now. but to me, i think the right person will help alleviate that as much as possible for you. but you'll need to be vulnerable and admit to that. good luck and give yourself grace. always rooting for you!

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