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Expect the unexpected

Third week of January 2018. Time is really really REALLY moving so darn slow! Was wishing it would move faster but in the end it still isn't. So shitty.

The sun still hasn't appear for five days I think? Though rain has stopped which is a good start but I would like some sun sometimes. I'm a sunny person.

Anyway, I'm kinda on a medical leave today. My tummy is acting up again and I really don't know what. It is really irritating and I'm just disliking it a lot. I think it is related to my gastric problem which I'm been facing for many years. Maybe I should get my self checked? I don't know. What if the doctor says I'm ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ?

I guess we have to expect the unexpected right?

One thing I've learn from the past couple of months is to really not expect anything out of anything. I'm the type of person who puts a lot of expectation on something but in the end, if it doesn't turn out the way I hoped it would, I would just get all upset and emotional for nothing.

I guess trying to manage expectations is not as easy as I though it would be. Although I've been telling myself that "Yea I can manage that, it is not a big deal..." but in the end I can't seem to bring myself to terms with it.

The last month or so, I've been putting quite a lot of expectation on something which I've invested a lot of time and emotions on. As time went by I notice was not getting the outcome I expected and I started getting emotional plus at times unhappy about it. Then I realise, perhaps I'm trying to hard and putting too much effort into it which will only make matters worst.

So recently (like days ago) I tried lowering everything down and moving away from it. To my surprise, it made me feel better. Then today, something I wasn't really fully expecting suddenly was made known to me and the reaction I had was "Oh okay". I wasn't down or fully unhappy but I felt like, "Yea I'm okay". I mean yes deep down I am sad but in the end the lesson I've learn is, to place my expectation at a point whereby even if it doesn't happen, I would not be so emotional or unhappy bout it, compared to how I was previously. I know it may seem crappy and stuff, but hey, I'm learning day by day.

So back to the above, yea, so the news I got was not what I hoped for but I guess that's how things are supposed to be and if its for the best so be it. Life goes on anyways right?

On a separate note, I'm going to learn how to swim! Yes I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO SWIM AT ALL except floating on my back.

Image result for how to swim gif

So why the sudden urge to learn? Well it is on my bucket list of things I should know how to do so I've decided that this year I should be doing things that I've always wanted too but been pushing it aside for months or even years.